Funny Stories to Share: Nine Light-hearted and Memorable Anecdotes

Welcome to a collection of nine charmingly humorous stories that capture the quirks and hilarities of everyday life. In these tales, you'll meet a football player caught in a familial dilemma, a student who finds honesty isn't always the best policy in school, and a man whose literal interpretation of concert tickets will leave you chuckling. Discover the antics of a young helper who unintentionally spoils a magician’s trick, and laugh at the mishap of a poet whose modernist "verse" is anything but poetic. Whether it's a boy’s unique take on arithmetic, a father's humorous plea to a history professor, or a child interrupting a football match with a culinary summons, each story promises a delightful twist that will brighten your day. Enjoy these whimsical anecdotes, each delivering a dose of light-hearted fun and clever comedy.

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HE IS MY FUTURE BROTHER-IN-LAW

The referee of a losing football team was seriously criticizing a player.
“Why, when you were face-to-face with the goalkeeper and only eleven meters from the goal, didn’t you shoot straight into the opposing team’s goal? Everyone could see that you deliberately kicked the ball out.”
“Yeah!... Please sympathize with me because that team’s goalkeeper is my future brother-in-law.”

Behaviour

A mother asked her son sadly:
“In all subjects, you got good marks. Why was your behavior bad?”
Her son answered:
“With the subject of behavior, I couldn’t look at my friends’ exercises to copy.”

A Half of a Ticket

A man went to the theater for a concert. At the ticket office, he said to the ticket seller:
“Please sell me half a ticket!”
“I don’t understand what you mean. Why half a ticket?” asked the ticket seller.
“Because my left ear has been deaf since last year. I can only hear with one ear.”

A New Trick

The conjurer was arranging a new stage trick, and on the day before its introduction, he asked his young son to help him.
“When I ask for a boy to come on stage, you must come at once. But you must not do anything or say anything that will make the audience think that you know me.”
The boy said he understood everything, and when the conjurer asked for help, he came forward quickly and was invited on stage. When he got there, the conjurer said:
“Look at this boy! He has never seen me before, have you, my boy?”
“No, father!” answered the boy.

A Poem

A young poet came to the magazine editorial office and said to the editor:
“I’m sorry! I made a mistake and sent you the grocery bill instead of my poem.”
“I thought it was a poem in modernistic language and sent it to the printing house,” replied the editor.

An Arithmetic Problem

A little boy bought a cricket with money that his parents gave him. In the arithmetic hour, the teacher asked him:
“Your father gave you six cents. Your mother gave you four cents. How many cents do you have now?”
“Teacher, I have a cricket now,” answered the boy.

Another Chance

Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year.
“He’s a good boy,” said Jack’s father, “and if you let him pass this time, I’m sure he’ll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well.”
“No, no, that’s quite impossible!” replied the professor immediately. “Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, and he didn’t know!”
“Please, sir, give him another chance,” said Jack’s father. “You see, I’m afraid we don’t take any newspapers in our house, so none of us even knew that Napoleon was ill.”

Dad Says to Come Home and Cook

Two women’s football teams were playing in full swing. Suddenly, a little boy stood at the edge of the field and shouted:
“Mama, my dad orders you to come home and cook!”

Handwriting

“Sir,” hissed the lawyer, “do you swear this is not your signature?”
“Yes.”
“Is it not your handwriting?”
“Nope.”
“Do you take your solemn oath that this writing does not resemble yours in any particular?”
“Yes.”
“How can you be certain?” demanded the lawyer.
“I can’t write,” smiled the man.

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